Ladies and gentlemen, please return your seat backs and tray tables to the upright position... ahhh, fuck the seat backs and tray tables! You've all got about 8 seconds to live! Just enough time for one last naked free-for-all. Knowing I was about to die, I'd have the nearest flight attendant pinned to the emergency exit for some zero-G, hair-on-fire, no-stopping-for-broken-bones ape sex. And then just my luck, we'd all survive. You've got to be kidding, one person died in this plane? That's really amazing. If I had been on this plane, and it happened too fast for the last second raping, with my aforementioned luck there would have been two fatalities. At least this person went out legit, not squashed like a bug under a desert racing truck. Now THERE was natural selection working at it's finest. Did you guys hear about that? 8 people killed by a truck at a race in the Mojave Desert, standing right alongside the track with no road or guardrails, so close they could touch the racers as they went by. Two different ways to die... I'd choose the plane crash.
Ok, the blog is now a real blog. I've officially posted a politically incorrect rant of sorts. I'm trying to keep it mild for any female readers. It could get worse...
Oh yeah, it's almost the weekend!
Wow Bro, I can see you are taking the new found freedom from Neopets to new heights. As I do not watch much television or get my news through normal channels I did miss the daily death toll, shock news, and other manipulated facts that the networks spew over the airwaves to horde in the cattle and keep the ratings high.
ReplyDeleteIt is a surprising story though. One person dies in plane crash while 8 others die from stupidity while by brother reviles his true nature which is only restrained by the fact that he is not about to die and their may be consequences to his actions. :) Females might want to think twice before flying with the Captain. LOL
Just another of the many risks one assumes when one travels by air. :D
ReplyDeleteWow, I missed both of those stories, too. I kinda live in my own little world. Don't catch much news.
ReplyDeleteGotta say that 8 seconds is not nearly enough time for a naked free-for-all. You'd have to be awfully talented to get it done that quick. ;)
Woohoo! Just got 1,618 in kitten cannon. :D That was one blown up kitten. Is there an avatar for going that far?
ReplyDeleteHey Jen! I can imagine an imminent death by gigantic explosion has a wonderful way of motivating one to the highest levels of both speed and efficiency. Eight seconds can be more than enough if that's all you have left in one piece.
ReplyDeleteHow was the heat today? Starting to rain a lot here. Probably a lot like your area.
We had another 95 degree day. It's still about that hot in my house, although it's cooled of considerably outside. I think our weathers have been reversed. I'm seriously considering sleeping outside in the tent tonight.
ReplyDeleteSounds like an excellent idea. I bet the house retains a lot of the day's heat. Run an extension cord for a fan and you'll feel like you're on a beach in the Maldives. Gnight... time to get on with some dark.
ReplyDeleteGoodnight, Captain. :)
ReplyDelete